Love Letter #10

id-100125771

 

Dec. 2012

 

Dear Suzie Marie,

 

90 minutes ago I got three letters from you. They came all at once. The first thing I did was tape your picture together. Wow! You are absolutely gorgeous. I am 100% attracted to you. Not only are you beautiful, but your smart, caring, understanding, intellectually deep, creative, and funny. Whats not to love? You are amazing!

02 (3)  +  02 (2)  +  02  +  02 (2)    =    02

I fully recognize every single one of your admirable qualities…and I LOVE them! Suzie my love, let me set your pretty little mind at ease. I just wanna love you baby. I wanna be a blessing in your life. I wanna be your best friend, and your hot sexy erotic lover. I wanna make you happy and treat you like the Goddess you are.

 

The facts are simple. I’m in prison…you’re not. I need you more than you need me. I’ve already gone 20 years without a woman to love. I’ve been saving myself for that special someone. I’ve been saving myself for you. I’ve already seen enough of you to know you are who I want. I will love you the way you desire. I will do all I can to make you happy. Just having you in my life makes me happy. You’re all I need, Suzie.

 

You wonder if I’ll like your body. Baby I’ll love your body more than a fat kid loves cake. I’ll make you feel so sexy and beautiful. I’ll worship you and treat you with the highest level of love and respect. I will encourage and support you no matter what you do. In my eyes, you can do no wrong. Therefore you never need to lie to me or keep things from me. And by that same token, you can trust that I will never lie to you. I seek an honest and loving relationship with you…until the day I die.

 

And if you ever feel like you need to move on, I will be understanding as I continue to offer my love and friendship. I realize that I am very lucky to have this opportunity to love you, Suzie. I will never lose sight of that. I will never take you for granted. My lengthy incarceration has given me true perspective on life and all that’s important. Coming to prison with a 43 year sentence at the age of 20, is like dying but still being alive to watch your family grieve. I refuse to take my incarceration in vain. I’ve dedicated the rest of my life to be the best I possibly can be. In every area! Mentally, physically, financially, the way I conduct myself, the way I treat others, etc.

I say all that to say this: I sincerely offer you the very best of me. True, I can write anything on this paper, I can say what you want to hear. But like I’ve said before, “The truth can withstand the test of time.” These words are only meant to inform you of what to expect. My actions will validate the sincerity of my heart.

 

When people do things I don’t like, I ask myself if they are doing that to hurt me, piss me off, annoy me, or if they are just being themselves and I’m the one with the issue. In other words, I’ve learned to look at the spirit in which an action comes from rather than the action itself. And if I love someone, I will accept them for exactly who they are. I will seek to understand them, cater to their weakness, and encourage their strengths.

 

I want to enable you and encourage you to do anything and everything your heart desires. Even if that means you marrying me for a few years, come get your freak on, then realizing this isn’t for you anymore. If that’s what you decide, then I will support you and continue to love you through the process. I say this because you’re still young and I still have 17-24 years before I get out. Maybe sooner, but for now that’s reality. If you can hang for the duration, great! If not, I totally understand. We might be married for 5 years before you meet a man who can give you the type of “hands-on” relationship I can’t.

 

Have you thought about having my babies? Have you thought about your family and how they’ll react? These are real issues that need to be confronted from the very start. And as you do so, always know I’m down for you. I have your back. And however you wanna do this is fine by me. Your comfort level is my concern. People you love will hate our relationship. How would you deal with that?

 

Food for thought my lady. I’ll conclude for now. I eagerly await your reply to this specific letter.

 

Thank you for bringing such beauty into my world.

 

Mwah…a soft kiss on your pretty face.

 

Sincerely,
Steven

Author: Steven & Suzie Jennings

She was raised as a Mormon, and he is a convict serving 43 years in prison. This blog offers a glimpse into two vastly different worlds that somehow came crashing together. Join them on their journey through prison life & married life.

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