Here is a poem I wrote back in the 1900’s…..1997 to be exact.
I remember it well. I was laying on my bunk staring at the ceiling…thinking…that I’m 24 years old with 39 years left to serve. I was also thinking about a girl I liked before I came to prison.
Sometimes I sit in my cell and I think of you girl,
and I think of the life I once had in this world.
I remember the feelings that I enjoyed so much,
now I long for the feelings created by your touch.
There’s so much pain that dwells in my heart,
it’s a pain that I feel in times I’m apart……
Apart from my family, my world, and love, passion filled romance is all I dream of.
There’s a pain I can’t fully explain,
but as I travel on it slowly drives me insane.
What will this do to me down the road,
after 20 years without a woman to hold.
The thought is scary the situation is real,
I’ve seen the results turn hearts to steel.
So I lay on my bed and look at the ceiling,
then my body gets chills from the love that I’m feeling.
I block out this joint with fantasies of you,
as I hope and pray for a love that’s true.
That was 18 years ago. As I read this poem, I’m struck by the part that says, “What will this do to me down the road, after 20 years without a woman to hold.” Because at the time I still had 40 years to serve. So why didn’t I say,”…after 40 years without a woman to hold.”?
But wait! There’s more. Suzie and I just had our 1 year anniversary. That means only 2 more years before we get our EFV’s. So the poem was right. From the time I wrote it, I’ll have gone 20 years without holding a woman…..soft and slow…..all night long….for 48 hours! OMGoodness. I get excited just thinking about it!
Wanna hear the type of poems I write when I get excited about our EFV’s? Naw…I better not.
But I will share this one…it’s called “Suzie”. I wrote it 12-24-12, just 3 weeks after we met.
Suzie excites my mind.
Is love blind?
It could be.
Look at you,
look at me.
We’ve never met.
Yet, this feeling I’ll never forget.
still I feel you in my heart.
With every letter,
this feeling gets better.
As we know each other longer,
my feelings get stronger.
It seems so crazy, these feelings so soon.
Met in December, married in June.
Absolute proof, our souls in-tune.
This love will make you a Mother.
First a daughter.
Then her brother.
Say the word and I’m all in.
A beautiful creation from within the pen.
Whatever you want I will do.
My love and devotion belongs to you.
Who knew life could be this sweet?
But that’s what happens when soul mates meet.
We didn’t get married in June. But I wanted to. I sent Suzie the marriage forms in only my 9th letter to her. I knew she was The One. When you know, you know. We have found true love in each other. 🙂