Narcissism

 

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I recently got to spend 64 hours with my wife. That’s 8 visits, for 8 hours a pop! We held hands, smooched, and played games (she kicked my butt!). We spent hours talking about EVERYTHING! Our communication is so open and honest. I love that. I love her!

As we were talking about blogging, I asked her, “Baby, why haven’t you sent me the blog comments lately?”

Her eyes started to tear up as she said, “Because people are starting to say negative things about you. I send you the fan mail but not the hate mail.”

I pulled her close and gave her a comforting hug. Then said, “That’s to be expected. It’s part of the Universal balance. With all the good that’s out there, there is also the bad.”

I asked her, “What are they saying?”

She answered, “They say things like: you’re narcissistic and manipulative and …..”

My eyes got wide and I pulled back my head. I looked at her for a second, then smiled. “Baby, I am narcissistic.”

She looked confused. Then asked, “Don’t those type of comments bother you?”

I got close and kissed her soft cheek, then said, “Not even a little bit.”

I wiped away a small tear in the corner of her left eye. Then wondered to myself…how does one eye cry and the other eye doesn’t?

She asked, “What does narcissistic mean to you?”

I said, “Let’s go get a dictionary and find out.”

She said, “Ok. But first let’s say what we each think it means.”

We both basically said, “It’s someone who is self-centered and self-absorbed.”

She looked at me and asked, “You think you’re those things?”

I answered, “Yes. To a degree. I’m self-centered around my personal growth and rehabilitation. And I’m self-absorbed with all my actions. I also think I’m good-looking and I have a sexy body.”

That put a smile on her sweet face. She rolled her eyes playfully and gave a little giggle.

Here’s what WEBSTER has to say about narcissism:

 

1. Inordinate fascination with oneself; excessive love.

2. Erotic gratification derived from admiration of one’s own physical or mental attributes.

3. Being a normal condition at the infantile level of personality development.

 

Yep! Just as I suspected….I have characteristics of narcissism.

I am fascinated with myself as I continue to grow and learn. I do love myself very much.

I have never experienced erotic gratification derived from my personal attributes. But give it time. Life isn’t over yet.

And what is this? It says, “A NORMAL CONDITION AT THE INFANTILE LEVEL OF PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT.”

Just like anything in life, some things apply, others don’t. It IS what it IS.

The important message here is to use the Universal powers for all things good. We can’t control what other people say or do. But we can control how we direct the power that is flung our way. We can allow words to hurt us and break us down. Or we can use those exact same words to build us up, make us stronger, expand our knowledge, and serve us well. That choice is ours!

By the time Suzie and I concluded this conversation, she was laughing and feeling good. Her pain was gone. A pain that she’d carried for weeks from several continuous comments that had destructive intent. This goes to show there is a state of consciousness that can heal instantly!

Bless her heart. She was holding that pain in, protecting me from those negative comments. With our honest communication, she and I were able to share our feelings openly on the subject. I absolutely love our relationship!

Thank you everyone for all your feedback. I welcome the good, the bad, and the ugly. IT’S ALL GOOD!

Have a great day.

 

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Steven Jennings

Author: Steven & Suzie Jennings

She was raised as a Mormon, and he is a convict serving 43 years in prison. This blog offers a glimpse into two vastly different worlds that somehow came crashing together. Join them on their journey through prison life & married life.

9 thoughts

  1. I wouldn’t say narcissist, but I will say you have a great sense of humor…and I quote:
    “how does one eye cry and the other eye doesn’t?” That really is a valid question. Have a blessed day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well done Steven! So impressed. One day someone accused me to my face of being selfish, self-absorbed and self- centred. In an instant I knew the truth of it so just agreed with her. It’s *all* okay!
    Alison

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I think you have to have some narcissism in you to write a blog, especially when you are being honest and putting the good and the bad out there about yourself. We want to be noticed and go to great lengths to do that so our writing is read. It’s hard, though, to not react to the bad stuff, especially when you know it isn’t try. Plenty of people just want to get a rise out of you. (there’s the sexual part of being narcissistic. lol ) As long as YOU know who you are and the reasons why you write – what your intentions are – and it isn’t to hurt anyone else – Suzie just needs to understand “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Tell them “Thank you for taking the time to write and I hope you have a good day.” That will take the punch out of their attempt to deflate yours.

    Liked by 1 person

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