The Love Of My Family

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I’d like to take this opportunity to thank my beautiful family for all their love and support. THANK YOU! Nothing brings me more joy than spending time with my family.

Before I came to prison, I completely took them for granted. I would’ve rather “kicked it” with my so called friends than spend some quality time with the people who love me unconditionally. And when I was around my family, I’d argue and fight over things that didn’t even matter.

Now, reflecting back on my past makes me love and cherish them even more today. I recognize the sacrifices and effort that it takes them to come visit me. I am so appreciative.

My siblings are now having babies of their own. When I held my niece Hudsyn for the first time, I felt something that I’ve never felt before. It’s hard to describe. But the situation is easy to see…I went from years of living around convicts and maintaining a hard image, to 3 hours of holding a soft, delicate, innocent, beautiful infant.

My very 1st visit with Hudsyn.
My very 1st visit with Hudsyn.
Me, Hudsyn, my sister Tabatha, & my brother-in-law Justin
Me, Hudsyn, my sister Tabatha, & my brother-in-law Justin

The emotional transition was too powerful to ignore. Living inside these walls does not provide opportunities to feel what I felt. True love. A love that’s pure. Love straight from the heart and soul. This one visit brought so much clarity to my life. It opened up a part of me that I never want to shut down.

But then the visit was over and I had to return back inside prison. The effects of that visit lingered. I continued to ignite my feelings by looking at these photos and reflecting back to that moment of pure joy.

But as the days went by, that strong feeling of love got weaker. No matter what I did, I couldn’t bring back that powerful feeling that I had experienced when I held Hudsyn in my arms. My love grew stronger. My desire to love grew stronger. My desire to feel love grew stronger.

Then it happened again. My baby sister Alana, who was only 14 years old when I came to prison, had her first child. She named him Walker Dale. My middle name is Dale. What an honor!

When I held Walker for the first time, it was all I could do to keep it together and not break down and cry.

My 1st visit with Walker Dale.
My 1st visit with Walker Dale.

I was living in the moment and enjoying the love of my family. When they leave, I miss them so much. I keep them in my heart and allow them to inspire me to be the best man I can be.

Me kissing Walker after missing him for 3 months.
Me kissing Walker after missing him for 3 months.

All I want to do is make my family proud. Everyday I strive for redemption as I work hard towards my goals. My family keeps me strong and focused. Never again will I let them down. Life is too short for anything but love & family.

Mom, my sister Alana, Walker, Hudsyn, Me, & my sister Tabatha
Mom, my sister Alana, Walker, Hudsyn, Me, & my sister Tabatha
Me, Walker, my sister Alana, & my brother-in-law Nick
Me, Walker, my sister Alana, & my brother-in-law Nick

My brother Danny has given me a beautiful niece named Austyn. I first met her when she was 5 years old. I love her dearly with all my heart. Thank you mom for bringing her up to see me. We always have sooo much fun.

Mom, Me, & Austyn
Mom, Me, & Austyn
Me, Austyn, Walker, & my sister Alana
Me, Austyn, Walker, & my sister Alana

Nothing brings me more comfort & joy than the love of my family. They are my inspiration.

I love you all & I miss you daily.

 

Steven Jennings

Author: Steven & Suzie Jennings

She was raised as a Mormon, and he is a convict serving 43 years in prison. This blog offers a glimpse into two vastly different worlds that somehow came crashing together. Join them on their journey through prison life & married life.

4 thoughts

  1. This was so very nice to read and really touched my heart for all that matters in the world is family. Steven I still remember the first time I held you when lyou were only days old! the best memory I have is holding you cheek to cheek on your first birthday! You loved your Auntie Mindy and being with your cousins Alisha and Angela. Then your mom and dad moved you to Washington and we didn’t see each other much. Cherish every moment you have with the babies they grow so fast!

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